Some more personal writing

I'm working on many projects at the moment. This should come as no surprise to those of you who know me. I'm notorious for juggling many balls in the air at the same time... or as my mother would say starting a million things and never finishing anything.


So instead of my usual rant about a random topic, here's an unedited (very raw) section of a story I'm working on.

Every day of Sumi’s childhood was laced with some mention of Amma’s dream. It could be as innocuous as Amma showing Sumi how to cook fish molee and throwing in an unconscious comment about how she would cook that dish for her husband one day. Rarely did Amma overtly say to her girls that she expected them to have an arranged marriage. It was assumed by everyone in the house. So much so that Sumi had not even thought to fight the idea. She had always assumed that that was how her life would pan out. She never questioned that that was what she wanted too.

Sumi had never disappointed her parents. She went to Bharata Natyam classes because Amma had not had the opportunity in her childhood. As it turned out, Sumi excelled in dance class. She quickly became the teacher’s pet and with Amma’s strict overseeing of her practice sessions, she learned more and more complex dances. She learnt to swim because Amma had not. She went to Carnatic singing classes because Amma had missed that opportunity. She learned the violin at school because Amma had always wanted to learn a musical instrument. And in all of this, she was expected to bring home nothing but As on her school report. Acha was a teacher and had been a brilliant student in his time, so he would accept nothing less.

She had started uni with high expectations of continuing her demonstrated academic performance to date. She hadn’t expected to be distracted by boys and knew she was perfectly capable of having a friendship with a boy that didn’t automatically transform into a relationship. She’d watched friends fall into and out of some teenage approximation of love all through the summer holidays and knew it wasn’t for her. She was a sensible, practical young woman and had no intentions of finding herself entangled in some tawdry, love-lorn liaison. But then, she had not expected to encounter someone quite like Michael.

An indulgence

Excuse my indulgence today. This came to me and I felt the urge to write it down. It feels right, so I'm going with that.

One Way Love

Their eyes met, her heart beat a little faster, “hi” she said.

He smiled quietly.

“You’re the one. The one I’ve been searching for all my life,” she said.

He smiled quietly.

“Don’t you feel the same? Don’t you feel the ache of it?,” she breathed.

He smiled quietly.

“You’re kind and sweet and gentle. I think I love you. No, I’m certain of it,” she said.

He smiled quietly.

“We’ve waited long enough. We’ve waited too long to find each other,” she said.

He smiled quietly.

“Let’s make the most of every second. Let’s dance and sing and love,” she said.

He smiled quietly.

“I’ll give up everything I’ve built for you. I’ll move, I’ll change,” she said.

He smiled quietly.

“I’m happier than I’ve ever been. My dreams have finally been realised,” she said.

He smiled quietly.

“Can life get any better? Is it greedy to want more?” she said.

He smiled quietly.

“You seem distant now. Have I asked too much? Is it me? Is there another?” she said.

He smiled quietly.

“When did it start? Who is she? Am I not good enough?” she said.

He smiled quietly.

“How could you do this to me? After all I’ve done for you? Is there no hope?” she said.

He smiled quietly.

“Is there nothing you can say in your defence? Can’t you be braver?” she said.

He smiled quietly.

“You’re not the one I thought you were. You’ve lied to me all this time,” she said.

He smiled quietly.

“I can’t continue with this charade. Let’s end it and go our separate ways,” she said.

He smiled quietly.

“How can you be so impassive? So heartless? So untouched? So cruel?” she said.

He smiled quietly.

“How could I ever have loved you? What did I see in you? Why did I let myself fall?” she said.

He smiled quietly.

“You’re unkind and cruel and heartless. I think I hate you. No, I’m certain of it,” she said.

He smiled quietly.

Their eyes met again, for the last time, filled with emotions old and new, words never said.

Her heart beat a little faster, “goodbye” she said.

He smiled quietly.